A   N O T E   F R O M   T H E   N E A R   S I D E

   Here finally is the submitted copy of my February 20, 1995 Buffalo News
"Nature Watch" column. I have also gathered most of your submissions, edited
in only minor ways, into ten files, each of about 220 lines (four pages when
printed onto standard 8.5" x 11" sheets). As it would take a great deal of
space on the Internet to post all of these files to your mail services, I
have instead placed them here, along with this column, where you may retrieve
them if you wish. 

   I have also forwarded hard copies of all of these files to Gary Larson.

   Here then is the text of my column:

Dear Gary Larson,

   At this time of your departure from our newspapers, I write to thank you
for your wonderful cartoons which regularly spoke with deep insight into our
interactions with the world of nature.

   I can imagine few naturalists who have not been captured by your
conceptions, but just to check, I asked scientists over the Internet to tell
me their favorite. The results of this carefully uncontrolled survey came as
a surprise even to me. I share some of them with you here.    

   Over 500 responded from around the world: from Bangalore, Canberra and Cape
Town, Madrid, Mexico City and Wellington, as well as from virtually every
college town across this country. Well known senior scientists wrote but so
too did students; after a month messages are still coming.

   Favorites crossed specialties. Not only paleontologists cited the three
most popular, all involving dinosaurs. "The Real Reason for Dinosaur
Extinction" with dinosaurs smoking cigarettes; giant dinosaurs laughing at a
tiny furry mammal -- as it begins to snow; the scientist with a large rectal
thermometer standing behind a brontosaurus, "Professor Higgenbottom was never
heard from again, leaving the cold-blooded/warm-blooded controversy still
unresolved."

   Many runners-up were specific to disciplines. Mammologists: "Animal Waste
Management," bears in hard hats have run their sewage line into a human home;
polar bears discussing how igloos are crunchy on the outside, chewy on the
inside. Meteorologists: Airline pilots playing with their controls and
maneuvering wildly but announcing to their passengers that they are flying
into turbulence. Primatologists: Female chimpanzee discovering a blond hair in
her mate's fur, "Been doing more 'research' with that Jane Goodall tramp?"
(I'm told that this was Ms. Goodall's favorite also.)

   Entomologists: Spiders have spread a large web across the foot of a
playground slide, "If we pull this off, we'll eat like kings"; father to
nubile young beetle, "Young lady, get back in there and wash off some of that
pheromone." Cetologists: The first fly approaching a beached whale calling
"Dibs!" Veterinarians: The test on equine treatment with the response to every
problem "Shoot." Wildlife managers: Deer with target on its chest, "Bummer of
a birthmark, Hal!" Apiarists: Honey bee on a vast comb looking at a map, his
wife saying, "Face it. You're lost." Behaviorists: Professor following a line
of ducks, "When imprinting studies go awry." Psychologists: Among Neanderthals
in a cave classroom is one lizard-like student, the teacher announcing, "Your
final grades are ready; I'm afraid not all of you will be moving up."

   Evolution got still more play: "Great Moments in Evolution" with baseball
playing fish looking out of the water at their ball on the beach. In my
original posting I mentioned my own favorite: A hoard of lemmings racing
across the panel, one wearing a life jacket. Many respondents agreed, a number
going further to point out the evolutionary concept of the "cheater" who beats
the system and is thus favored by natural selection.

   Dozens spoke of using cartoons like these as class illustrations and one
said why: your drawings "illustrate biological principles in a twisted way
that appeals to students," adding significantly, "and to me." Yes, they
mentioned their favorite cartoons, but what came through so many messages was
the high regard and genuine affection these scientists feel for you. Let just
one represent them: "Mr. Larson has made many a dreary night in the lab and
tiring day in the field turn bright and wonderful!"

   I join my colleagues in hoping that some day you will share with us more
of your wisdom and your wild conceptions. If you do, surely systematists will
find something better to name for you than that biting louse, Strigiphilus
garylarsoni, that is already assigned.

   Sincerely yours, Gerry Rising